i sweep my black hair off the back of my neck and turn slightly to see my profile in the mirror.
i hear the murmur of hooves against the thirsty earth, and the dead trees on the skyline are silent in the cool wind. no leaves ripple in the wind i cannot feel. i hear the whistling snorts and the discordant wails pulled from their throats. unearthly beasts, filled with fear. thick coarse hair and stone skinned hides are flowing over me. the squeals of pain and bellows of blood lust are loud enough to taste.
they are snarling and tearing each other apart in the slaughterhouse of my mind. each thought is wicked and sharp with too many teeth, even the light thoughts are tainted with tentacles or horns. i am motionless on the flat faced rock they flow over and around, its dark gray porous surface is pocked and warm with its own heat under my burnt fingertips. the dust stirred up from their wicked paws should smother me.
i never was looking at myself, i was trying to see what everyone else saw.
i hold my breath as i clench my fingers into fists while they circle closer.
